Showing posts with label House of Prayer. Show all posts

Yesterday at the House of Prayer, Jesus was speaking to me on what it means to live my life before Him, before my Audience of One.

He said to me, "All day long, I wait upon you, My beloved. I wait for the glance of your eyes to look My way, and when you do, My heart is moved and overwhelmed. I would wait a thousand years for you, My love, and I would not move from your side because that is how much I love you and long for you. You delight My heart and I am filled with joy when I look upon you."

I was so broken before Him because when I heard His tenderness and love, I knew that every word that He spoke was true. That He follows me everywhere I go, waiting for me to acknowledge Him, and most of the time I am too 'busy' and distracted by everything else. I was so sad to know that even though I am so important to Him, I don't treat Him like the King that He is.

But He said, "Beloved, I am patient. I am kind. I do not force but I draw you deeper by the power of My love and not by your strength. I am watching you and I am captivated by your beauty." With those words, He revived me again in the hope that one day, one day, I will be everything that He died for me to be. That it won't just be a concept but actual reality. Oh, how I long for the day when I am in the deepest communion with Him and there is no more separation...that whether I am washing the dishes or eating my dinner, I would know experientially that He is there with me, loving me in every moment.

I am absolutely loving my time at the House of Prayer.

I was originally supposed to stay in Penang to serve at a drop-in center for homeless people with YWAM, but because I was so homesick, I ended up going home to Singapore. I was quite bummed at first when I made that decision, because I really wanted to give this summer to the Lord and serve Him. I'd been praying about this summer since last year, so I was sad that I was going to 'miss out' on what the Lord had for me.

But when I made the decision to come home, I really felt like this was the right decision, and I had a lot of peace about it. The Lord even spoke to me and said that He had something for me in Singapore. However, at the time, I was a little doubtful because I thought that was my own flesh talking to try and comfort me at 'bailing out'. But here I am in Singapore having a BLAST being in His house and spending my summer worshipping and crying out to Him!

He really knows me so well...He was speaking to me on Saturday that He really saw my heart and how much I wanted to give myself to Him this summer, and He knew that I would've served at that drop-in center if He had told me to. But, He told me that He knows how I am made, and He knows the deepest desires of my heart, so He wanted to place me in an environment where I am released in all my dreams and giftings! How awesome is that?!?!

Honestly, there is nothing I love better than being in His house of prayer. If they were 24/7, I don't think I would ever go home apart from to shower and get a change of clothing! He knows me better than I know myself! I would've really enjoyed serving at the drop-in center, but seriously, there is nothing that makes my heart sing like being in His house of prayer!!!!!! I didn't even know this place existed until after I had made my decision to go home!

He planned every step of the way and took even my homesickness into account :) I am so happy! He is such a good and joyful God!

When I was at the House of Prayer on Saturday, I saw the following vision.

I saw a ballroom full of people, and all of us were standing on the sides, looking at the empty dance floor. Then Prince Jesus walked up to me and asked me to dance. I didn't know how to dance, but He wasn't worried. "Follow Me," He said and so I did. He led and I responded and together we dance and twirled and looked so good together.

He said to me, "Out of a crowd of people, I would choose you. Beloved, it has always been you. You have always been the one for Me." (I know that He was speaking this not just to me, but to all of us who are His.)

Then I heard Him say, "Wait for Me. Do not grow weary but watch and wait, for I will surely come. I will surely come for you and bring you home with Me. I have not forgotten you but My heart is ravished by you. I will come for you. I will not tarry but I will come for you."

He impressed it so strongly upon my heart that He will come for me, and it moved me so much to remember once again that this life we live on earth is so small, so little, and that when our lives on earth is over, we will be able to see Him face to face and gaze into His eyes of love. I couldn't stop weeping as He said all this to me, because I was just longing for Him so much and I am hungry for the day when I can stand before Him and feel His arms of love around me.

As I stood there worshipping, I saw Him breathe and blow upon my heart, and all these seeds and fragrance were released all around me. In the intimacy of this moment, I knew that I would give up everything just to touch heaven and be with Him. Everything faded away until all there was left was burning, consuming love. In that moment, even my greatest desire here on earth to be married faded away until I realised that if I never get married, I wouldn't just be okay, but that I would be blessed because then He would be the Only One.

"Wait for Me," He said, and I realised that even the greatest marriages here on earth are but a shadow of the real marriage that will take place in heaven! Where I will know the greatest intimacy that I have ever known, and where all my desires and dreams will be satisfied in Him!

I want to waste my life on Him! I want to pour out extravagent worship and devotion to Him that will be mocked and scorned by the world, but I will smile and rejoice because I know that I have everything my heart has ever searched for. I don't want to be "useful", I don't want to have a "function", I just want to praise and worship Him all the days of my life.

I cried out to Him, "Consume me, consume me, Jesus!!!" and I saw a vision of myself being burnt at the stake. When I looked closer, I saw that I was not even tied to the stake, but that I was free! I was choosing to be burnt alive in the fire of His love, and as the fire consumed me, my face was radiant with joy. The more the fire burned, the more radiant I became and the louder I worshipped because I knew that though the fire might hurt at times, He purifies me so that I can draw ever closer and closer to Him.

Jesus, You are my Treasure! You are the only true Treasure in this world! The only One worth investing my everything in!!!! Take from me and make it Yours! I love you!!!!!!

I have a lot to share so I think I'm going to end up writing 3 blog posts in one shot :)

I'm now back in Singapore and God has led me to the One Thing Ministries House of Prayer. It was really cool how He did it! The more I walk with Him, the more I can see that it's not a guessing game with Him, or trying out things by trial and error, but He delights in making His will known to me. And even when I am not discerning His will by hearing clearly, He still leads me exactly to where I need to be so that I can hit the target!

When I was in Penang, I really wasn't in the mood to mingle, socialize and get to know new people, so I mainly stuck to spending time with people I already knew. But there was one lady named Janet that really stood out to me, and out of the 70 students that were there, she was the only one that I didn't know before that I ended up talking to. It turns out that Janet used to serve here at the House of Prayer in Singapore, and I was so interested in it (I'd never heard of a place like that in Singapore!) that when I got back to Singapore, I just couldn't even wait for her to contact me and take me, so I ended up Googling the place and going on my own.

How cool is it that out of all the students, God would lead me and prompt me to talk to the one person that would become such a huge connection for me in Singapore?!?!? When I went to the House of Prayer for the first time last Friday, no one talked to me apart from one girl named Winnie. There was an instant connection between us because we realized that we were of the same heart...wanting to spend all our lives just sitting at His feet, dwelling in His house and gazing upon His beauty. Not even to do all that hardcore spiritual warfare stuff, but just to adore Him in extravagent worship! It's so rare for me to meet someone who is like a Mary of Bethany, just like me! :D Apparently she's said it was really rare for her to meet Marys too, even in the house of prayer!

When I talked to Janet on Sunday, she said that it was really weird that Winnie would talk to me, because she's normally very quiet and doesn't talk to newcomers. How cool is it that out of a room full of people, that God would prompt the one person who was like me?!?!?! He really knows what He's doing!!!